Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Luis Suarez and the Jumbo Double Whopper

photo by avlxyzvia PhotoRee

In  which Columnist Ed responds, and makes a few accusations of his own:

Well, it seems a few writers have taken me to task here at FOF.  I would like to presume it's an honest disagreement with what I've written, but sometimes I suspect it's my boyish good looks that generate this kind of retaliation.  Anyhow, let's begin as it's getting near my bedtime.
1.   Scott on Suarez
Columnist Scott spends an entire blog post (See “No Backing Off Barton”) on the attack for my suggestion that people cut BPL bad boy Joey Barton some slack for retaliating for being "fouled rather flagrantly" as Correspondent Scott put it, by Carlos Tevez.  Of course by "fouled rather flagrantly" Corresp. Scott means “punched in the face.”  Not to nitpick, but I believe Corresp. Scott’s description lacks a certain precision, a defect that most certainly wouldn’t be found in the description of someone who was actually, well, punched in the face.  I should also note that my blurb was not intended to suggest that the "thug and bad boy" (my words, not Corresp. Scott's) should escape punishment, but rather to suggest that the rest of us shouldn't hyperventilate over what occurred.  Why?  Because before we get to Joey, we ought to spend a great deal of time and space hyperventilating over City's own Nigel DeJong, an individual without the anger management problems of Barton but who rarely goes a game without breaking someone’s leg or, it seems, trying to.  See, e.g., Stuart Holden in a friendly (a friendly!) against the Netherlands, and, of course, Hatem Ben Arfa.  Or if you prefer:

Xavi Alonso is still wondering whether De Jong was being truthful when told him not to move because there was a bee on his sternum.
De Jong gets some bad press and has had that single red in his career (you read that right), but he's nowhere near our poor anger management challenged Joey.  If I recall, in the very game that Barton got thrown out of after injuring no one (except what should have been the price of Sergio Aguero), De Jong tackled someone and ended his game.  Result?  No card.  Coincidentally the same result for De Jong after breaking the legs of Stuart Holden and Hatem Ben Arfa.  So  yes, Joey should have been suspended, and yes, he's totally crazy, but come on, was it that bad?  Was it Nigel De Jong bad?  Or was it just Joey being "Vinnie Jones without the class" as one emailer put it.  I'd leave it at that -- really, I would -- but I think Corresp. Scott's real problem with what I wrote reared (or more accurately, projected) its ugly head, literally and figuratively, when he wrote this:
"There is no need to back off such horribly inappropriate behavior. In fact, I say pile on. His ban should be at least what Luis Suarezreceived. After all, Suarez didn't [BLA BLA BLA]…."



2.  Farlie on Fraud
Well, our beloved leader tried to slip one by the other day when he wrote this little nugget:
"Next year's Champions League spots are taken up by the following four teams: City, United, Arsenal and Chelsea.  I believe I predicted the same on these pages back in mid-August of last year, as opposed to some of our Columnists who predicted a top four finish for Liverpool (Scott is excused for his over exuberance [sic] in this area, but Ed has no excuse, really-- none at all).  Okay, so I may have gotten the order wrong -- the last day of the season kind of hurt me there -- but I got the teams correct, and there ought to be some prize for that."
Wow, talk about a double jumbo whopper. 

What FOF actually predicted in his piece last year was in his words "the top four teams" for the season and not as only the revisionist FOF could put it: "the teams that would qualify for the Champions League."  I think FOF even acknowledges as much when he admits that he "may have gotten the order wrong."  (I'm sorry, but is there an "order" to the Champions League qualifying teams?  If so, in what position would we put Chelsea?) 
Okay, so let's revisit this prediction now that we are armed with REALITY.  FOF said the top four teams in the BPL would be, in this order:  1.  United  2. City  3. Chelsea 4. Arsenal.  Instead, the top four teams in the BPL were, in this order: 1. City 2. United 3. Arsenal 4. Spurs.  So it turns out that FOF predicted exactly NONE of this accurately.  This despite going WAY OUT ON A LIMB and predicting the top four would be the top four richest and most successful teams in the league and that nineteen time winner United would finish first.  Wow, I just got chills.
Let’s all look forward to some additional predictions from the fearless one for this summer’s Euro's.  Things like:  "Look for Spain to be pretty good."  Or maybe even, "I don't think Scotland's got a chance." 
This is farlieonfootie for May 29.

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