Thoughts from Twitter: Manchester United 4 - Fulham 1

o Giggs with the PK.  Finally, someone who knows how to take 'em...

o United 1 - Fulham 0 inside of three minutes. This game is #Over.

o Can we have an easy game for once, please?  I've worn a path in the carpet pacing back and forth these last few weeks.

o It appears that sunny #Qatar helped. This team looks #Energized today.

o The Old Trafford pitch looks terrible, kinda like a goat patch.

o Chicharito just knocked over Schwarzer as if he was made of paper. Has the Little Pea been bulking up?

o Surely that's a second hand ball?!  Clattenburg's got to be blind not to see it.

o Fulham's defense makes United's look like world beaters. Hot knife through butter doesn't begin to describe how easily United are going through their back line.

o The Welsh Wizard still has his moments of pure brilliance. You can't hide class.

o It must be wonderfully easy to be a football commentator.  If only Fulham had a bit more "belief" they'd be in the game. Who knew it was that #Simple?

Oh, Cruel Fate: Round 18 in the BPL

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o Fate was more than a bit cruel to Reading on Saturday. At first we were convinced that the Royals had set out their defensive stall much too early  -- Who goes to Eastlands thinking they can play non-stop defense for the entire second half...?  But then we almost, just almost, began to believe that they were actually going to pull it off: the first shutout at Eastlands in quite some time. But up popped the unlikely head of Gareth Barry to seal what could be a vital three points at the end of the season for Manchester City.

o And because of that ultra-late winner, we'll name Gareth Barry our Player of the Week -- will wonders never cease?! -- but only because of the dramatic nature of the midfielder's stoppage time winner on Saturday. His play would be ruled a foul 99.99% of the time, but because newly inserted Reading man Nicky Shorey made no attempt whatsoever to play the ball, the goal appeared justly awarded to our eyes.

o We're not quite certain what Rafa is doing with Chelsea, but you have to like the results. That is, unless you're an Aston Villa fan....

o They may not be turning Japanese, but Chelsea turned up the heat on their Premier League rivals in Manchester with their outlandish victory on Sunday. Outdoing even their 7-1 defeat of the Villans from a couple of season ago, the Blues demolished Aston Villa, making the two point conversion for a remarkable 8-1 final on Sunday, in a game that could have seen 4 or 5 more goals -- and (amazingly so) one in which the Villa 'keeper was the best player on the pitch.  The end result was one of the more comprehensive beatings we've seen in several years:  When the names of Frank Lampard and Fernando Torres are both on the score sheet, you know you're in serious trouble....

Premier League Transfer Madness: Going Out on a Limb

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In which we go out on a limb to analyze the latest transfers -- both fact and gossip:

Dimitar Berbatov to Fulham: We've spoken early and often of our admiration for the languid Bulgarian, so it will come as no surprise that we think this will be a great pick up for Fulham.  As one Twitter wag stated yesterday, Martin Jol must be an absolute transfer genius to have picked up Mladen Petric and Dimitar Berbatov solely with the funds he received from offloading Bobby Zamora.  We can't wait to see Dimi receive the regular football he deserves, and believe he will once again be near the top of the League in goals by the end of the season.  If Berbatov does what we think he can, Manchester United may be glad they've already played Fulham once this season.

Andy Carroll to West Ham United (on loan): Could this be a marriage made in heaven?  Sure sounds like it to us.  Big Sam loves kick and run football -- and whose head is better to aim at than the ponytailed Geordie?  We don't see Carroll ever being worth anything close to £35 million in this lifetime, but if his form revives in a system that suits him, this could be a rather shrewd loan move by the scousers.

Clint Dempsey to Aston Villa: Seriously?  If this move comes off, Clint Dempsey's agent ought to have his hearing checked: Dempsey expressed a desire to play in the Champions League -- not the Championship next season.

Moussa Dembele to Spurs: A nice acquisition by Spurs, who may be shedding themselves of a midfielder or two in the next couple of  hours (see below for more).  We've always liked Dembele, and his fine form from last season has continued into the current campaign.  Spurs need more directness in their attack, and Dembele could be just the man to supply it.

Fernando Llorente to Liverpool: Sorry Liverpool fans, as much as you'd love it, it's just not happening.

Scott Sinclair to Manchester City: [Yawn.]  Someone had to replace Adam Johnson on the bench at Eastlands.

Julio Cesar to QPR: Someone check this man's age.  The calendar may show 32, but he's already showing signs of severe dementia, claiming that he believes QPR will win the League.  Mark Hughes' strategy seems to involve buying anything that's not nailed down at the current moment, and we believe this is a move that the club will soon regret.  Isn't Robert Green good enough for the Championship next season?

Edin Dzeko to Arsenal: If this one is true, Arsene Wenger should step down for the good of the club and its fans.  If he were to acquire Dzeko, Wenger will have officially jumped the shark.  To clarify, when we were saying Arsenal should be a bit more physical, we were talking about the defense and midfield, Arsene.

Out of the Blocks: Manchester United 3 - Fulham 2

Photo by Shanowpw on Flickr

Q. Any surprises in Saturday's starting lineup?

A. No. Unless you consider a healthy Wayne Rooney starting the game on the bench and Anderson beginning the game on the pitch to be surprises. Which approximately 599.9 million of United's 600 million worldwide fans did.

Q. Whoah!  Any other pre-game shocks?

A. Only if you allow that Fulham's first goal came so early in the contest that it might as well have occurred pre-game. In fact, Fulham were out of the blocks so quickly that even the watching Usain Bolt was impressed!

Q.  What?! That must have sucked...!

A. The only thing that sucked was all of the air from the stadium when Robin Van Persie scored for the first time in a United uniform, near the game's ten minute mark.

Q.  That injury prone 'has been' hit the mark?

A.  Yeah, and his timing was way off. He could have put the ball at least a foot higher if he really intended to steer it into in the very top corner.

Q. Did the goal set off an explosion?

A. No, not an explosion. That came after Shinji Kagawa hit the net. And then hit the post a minute later.  And then only after Rafael scored twice, with the first goal being judged offside. That's when the explosion happened.

The Humdrum of the Cup

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Not the most thrilling week of action outside of the Liverpool - Manchester United game. I caught a bit of Tottenham beating Watford -- and think his may now be Spurs' cup to lose. When you can play that poorly and still win, it's often a sign that something special is in process.

o I also caught a small portion of the battle for the hearts and minds of North America, as Clint Dempsey and Fulham took on Landon Donovan, Tim Howard and Everton. I guess you'd say advantage Donovan and Howard as the LA Galaxy man had a couple assists to lead the Liverpudlians to victory. Although honestly, the advantage is ultra slim, as I don't think that many people in North America really care much about either team.

o Switching to Saturday's action, it was great to see the FA foregoing years of tradition by foresaking the handshake before the Chelsea - QPR game. Great way to set an example for the youth of the world, gentlemen.

o And tongue firmly in cheek, it was refreshing to see Chelsea destroy another weak team this season.  Their lone goal from the spot looked especially free flowing.

Nodding Off: Fulham 1 - Liverpool 0

Correspondent Ed Preparing Game Notes on Monday's Contest
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Andy Carroll got the nod alongside Luis Suarez on Monday, as Liverpool traveled to Craven Cottage to take on Fulham.  Or maybe it's better to say Carroll caused a nod on Monday.  As in, I just about nodded off while watching him play. And King Kenny didn't look so happy with his charge, either. Carroll looks totally out of synch with his Liverpool teammates on offense -- they're trying to play a high tempo, quick movement game, and he's just not quick or good enough to keep up.

Meanwhile, Fulham's strike corps is not in a much better state: Bobby Zamora is a striker who generally personifies the attitude that if one touch in the box is good, three must be even better.

Fulham's attack looked labored at best, and stuck in the mud at worst. They had no movement or rhythm at all to their play until after Jay Spearing was red carded, and created very few real chances in the first 75+ minutes on Monday night playing in front of their home crowd. I'm not exactly sure what Martin Jol's new system is, but the Fulham players don't seem to be getting it. At all.

And it's not just on the pitch that Fulham has problems.  Such is the current state of chaos in the Cottagers' locker room that their players were recently given a gag order, told by management not to speak with the media. Lots of dissatisfaction with the current state of affairs, if you believe the reports....  It's such a strange situation at Craven Cottage: ever since Uncle Woy was wooed away to take the reins at Liverpool West  Brom, Fulham has been on a path straight downward. First, Mark Hughes walked away from the head coaching job FOR NO APPARENT REASON AT ALL, then Martin Jol came in, and has only won 3 games (including Monday night's contest). Fulham now find themselves in a relegation dogfight, and it could be a long year in West London. At least they'll always have their Michael Jackson statue....

Maxi Man

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May 9, 2011, Craven Cottage, London, England
Fulham 2 – 5 Liverpool
Article by Correspondent Scott

Not to be outdone by Manchester United’s goal in the first minute of their clash with Chelsea a day earlier, Liverpool pounced on Fulham at Craven Cottage while the Cottagers were still pulling up their socks.  Shortly after kickoff, the Brazilian, Lucas, found Luis Suarez down the left flank and the Uruguayan unselfishly squared the ball to the charging Dutch boy, Dirk Kuyt, who saw the ball kicked from his path by the lunging Mark Schwarzer, only to fall appetizingly for Liverpool’s most in-form player, the Argentinean Maxi Rodriguez, who added to his recently impressive tally by completing the multinational effort with an authoritative strike.  And just like that, with only 30 some-odd seconds off the clock, Liverpool continued their scoring ways of late.

Fulham, not amused, replied with a flurry of fouls that were literally kick-started by Danny Murphy’s yellow card offense.  Nor did their mood improve when, in the 7th minute, Maxi struck again with a skillful, on-the-run, inside-foot volley that converted Glen Johnson’s arcing, yet accurate cross.

Liverpool, playing with the confidence of title contenders, weren’t even threatened until the 14th minute.  But Fulham’s time with the ball was short-lived as Liverpool countered and Schwarzer’s day got even worse when his second blatant error of the day resulted in a third goal, as Kuyt’s shot squibbled (let’s just say it's a word because it really seems to fit) by him at the near post.  After a quarter of an hour, it seemed as if Liverpool was the home side such was their dominance, and the Kop-ites that made the journey south were doing their part with raucous renditions of “You’ll Never Walk Alone”.  If not for the sea of white shirts in the stands, you’d swear you were in Merseyside rather than London.

A Day in the Sun

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Sir Alex gives Dimitar Berbatov a rare start up top today, putting him at the sharp end of a three-man attack that also includes Nani and Valencia on the wings. United's midfield also includes the returning Anderson, Gibson and Scholes, while the defensive core of Vidic and Smalling is partnered by Evra and O'Shea, with the Pole in Goal, Tomas Kuszczak, returning for one of his final appearances at Old Trafford before his expected departure this summer. 


It's a lineup that includes eight changes to the team that played Chelsea on Wednesday, and one that showcases United's extraordinary depth, with the bench consisting of Owen, Carrick, Chicharito and more. Rio Ferdinand is given the day off, and Wayne Rooney is suspended -- what freakin' what!! -- so two of United's most important players should be rested and raring to go for the big match on Tuesday.

It's the visitors, though, who are first to test the 'keeper, as Scholes is guilty of an early giveaway, and although Kuszczak spills Gael Kakuta's shot, he's able to quickly gather the rebound and snuff out the threat. United 's first test comes a few minute's later, as Valencia nearly picks out Berbatov, and Nani's blast of the rebound is deflected well over the bar.

The game is wide open early on, as players on both sides refuse to close down the opposition, and the midfield offers plenty of space.  Moussa Dembele and Bobby Zamora both have decent chances for Fulham, and the United defense looks a bit shaky in the early going.

Helter Skelter

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Just a quick editorial aside to make room for the latest news before today's blog.  I think all regular readers of the blog will recognize that I'm biased (see yesterday's blog entry for an example), so take it for what you want.  


The headlines out of Manchester and London were consumed yesterday with the news of Carlos Tevez' written demand to leave Manchester City during the January transfer window.  I won't re-hash old news except to say "I told you so."  The guy is a malcontent from the word "Go," and one of those types for whom the grass is always greener somewhere else.  Call me slow, but I realized this when United gave Tevez (or his agent, the ultra-shady Kia Joorabchian) his ostensible asking price, only to be repaid with a refusal to sign and a move across town.  As far as I'm concerned, it's good riddance to Tevez, and Sir Alex has once again proved why he's among the smartest minds in world football.  See ya later, Carlos; enjoy playing for Boca Juniors, and we'll see you in 'El Superclasico' real soon.   


I spent the better part of my day going from football match to football match today; most of the games I saw happened to be in the Premier League, but not all of them.  In fact, the most special game I witnessed took place in the middle of my day, but I'll come back to that a little later.


First of all, the facts, plain and #simples, as they say: it may be cold wherever you're reading this, but in South Florida it's all sunny blue sky and 71 degrees (21.6 degrees celsius, for those of you scoring from England).  Nice and cool in the shade, but a bit hotter out in the sun.  All in all, though, not too shabby for a mid-December Saturday; kind of puts you in the Christmas mood....


Unlike many of you, we get our games in the morning and early afternoon over here in the eastern part of the US.  So it's often wake up for breakfast, turn on the tv, and start watching to begin the weekend.  Because there was no noon-time GMT kickoff today, I got to sleep in, and enjoyed a nice cup of coffee and quick read of the papers before the action got rolling.


To begin the day I managed to catch about a quarter of Bayern Munich's game against St. Pauli (somwhat confusingly, I thought St. Pauli was a beer, and not a football club based in Hamburg; I guess you really do learn something new each day).  I managed to catch just enough of the game to whet my appetite for EPL football, but when I saw Bastian Schweinsteiger's fine layoff lead to an early goal for the men from Munich, it made it all that much more bitter when I read the news later in the day that Schweini had signed a five year extension to stay at Bayern.  I was genuinely hoping he'd end up in Manchester by summer's end.