May Day: Week 4 in the BPL

photo by SliceofNYC	via PhotoRee

o Chelsea and QPR may have drawn 1-1 this weekend, but the least surprising development of the day was Ranger's left back Fabio limping off the Loftus Road pitch after less than 18 minutes. You didn't think switching teams would somehow make him sturdier, did you?

o We may already have had a soft spot in our heart for Ji-Sung Park, but our respect for QPR's South Korean Captain grew by leaps and bounds when he refused to shake John Terry's hand prior to the game against Chelsea this Saturday. Taking a stand for principled people everywhere, Parky reminded us all of what's important in life: respect, a word the Chelsea Captain likely can't even spell.

o Two goals by Dimitar Berbatov in his first 90 minutes for Fulham, and let's see.....  Maybe someone could tell me what he was doing on the bench for the last year and a half...?!  And just because we can, we're handing Dimitar our Player of the Week honors to pay homage to his brace.

o Arsenal may have cruised to a 6-1 victory over Southampton on Saturday, but for us the most touching part of the entire afternoon was Wojciech Sczcesny's loving tribute to teammate Lukasz Flappyhandski, in which the younger Pole managed singlehandedly to end the Gunners' shutout streak at more than 300 minutes, all in a style all too familiar to Arsenal fans. It's nice to know that while Fabianksi may be gone, he's definitely not forgotten.

o It may only be the fourth game of the season, but all of Manchester United's pre-season signings have found the net as of Saturday -- are you reading this, Olivier Giroud? -- with both Alexander Buttner and Nick Powell adding their names to the scorer's sheet. They've joined Shinji Kagawa and Robin Van Persie, which leaves us with only one question: when will Angelo Henriquez get his first start..?

o By the way, do you think there may have been any celebrating going on in gypsy caravan party camp when Alexander Buttner scored his goal...?  Just askin'....

Week 1 in the BPL: Where the Storylines Never Change

A Behind the Scenes Look into Columnist Ed's Office
photo by Nesster	via PhotoRee

The Barclay's Premier League is back, and a new season is well and truly underway, which can only mean one thing: new names and new kits, but the same old crazy outcomes. Some observations forthwith on a weekend that was predictably uncommon, and left Swansea and Fulham in unfamiliar territory at the top of the League:

o For once I found myself agreeing with Steve McMananman, who pointed out while Arsenal have brought in a bunch of firepower to replace Robin Van Persie, they've chosen to stand pat on a defense that includes the wobbly Per Mertesacker, the shaky Kieran Gibbs and the bumbling Wojciech Sczcesny.  We've pointed it out before on these pages, Arsene, but you can't expect to win in this league without a rock solid defense. Not that you were thinking of doing that this campaign.... 

o Of course, Arsenal did manage to shut out Sunderland on Saturday, but let's remember that this was a Black Cats squad that found the net impossibly small during their run in last season....

o With all the fuss about Joey Barton, someone forgot to tell Mark Hughes and QPR that the season kicked off this past weekend. Although somehow we imagine that 5-0 home thrashings will have a way of grabbing your attention.

o It was strange to see Fabio all decked out in his natty sailor boy QPR kit. Same for Parky, as well. After Saturday's thrashing, I'm pretty certain they've figured out their newest stop is a bit closer to Siberia than it is to Manchester. And while Parky's move is sadly permanent, Sir Alex may want to re-think the Fabio loan deal: it now appears as if the only defensive experience the Brazilian will pick up at QPR is learning how to pick the ball out of the back of the net.

o I'll say it now, so you can't accuse me of an unsubtle bias later in the season: I don't like QPR after the way they handed the title to City last season -- not even one little bit -- and I hope they get relegated.

o Gylffi who?  Welcome to the Premier Leage, Michu....  It looks as if Swansea may have found a goodun'.

o Another season, another shutout for Villa, and this to a newly promoted side.  Welcome to the hot seat, Mr. Lambert. You're not in Norwich anymore....

o Just sayin', but I'm not certain that Adam Federici, Reading's goalkeeper, is ready for prime time.

o Granted it was against Wigan, but if Eden Hazard continues to look as good as he did on Sunday,  the rest of the League had better stand up and pay attention. Juan Mata may have made a decent impact on the Blues last season, but Hazard's not just about the pretty stepovers and a pass -- he seems to have a genuine knack for finding the open man in front of net. Playing largely from the right, Hazard gave Chelsea not only an extra offensive gear, but more importantly the width that the Blues have lacked the last couple of campaigns.

The Manchester Derby, As Seen Through Tweets I Should Have Sent

photo by _DaniloRamos	via PhotoRee

Ji-Sung Park starting?  Where did Fergie dig him up from?

Fergie’s gone all defensive, playing his European system tonight.  Hope it works out better than our other European games have this season.

Good God, I’m nervous, and the game hasn’t even started yet.

Just breathe

Nani looking in the mood tonight

United start brighter, City on their heels.  Can the Reds capitalize?

Quick question, one I can ask only because I have a HD television: Is Rooney dying his hair now? 

City more comfortable on the ball now.  United having a tough time getting the ball back.

Steve McManaman has never seen a foul on a #MUFC player that was justified.

Halfway through the first half.  Not only scoreless, I don’t recall a shot from either side…

United appear to have placed little importance on keeping the ball tonight.

Marriner calling the game in a way that appears more favorable to United to date.

Lots of room in the box for El Kun there.  Where was the defense?!

A goal here would be a killer.

Park with ANOTHER giveaway.  Sigh.

Yup, that one was coming.  Kompany unmarked, 1-0 City. *vomit*

HT Score:             City 1 – United 0
Should be:          City 1 – United 0

All season long we’ve been scoring late first half goals.  Today we surrender one.  How big a problem is that?

I think we can all agree that the Park experiment has failed.  *Back to the Drawing Board*

Lots of Questions, Very Few Answers

photo by Brianfit	via PhotoRee

1. Why is everyone seeming to blame Mario Balotelli for City's recent dip in form?  He may be a convenient scapegoat, but the Italian is also the Sky Blues' leading scorer since the New Year began.  There's plenty of blame to go around on the other side of Manchester, starting at the top, but it seems so easy just to point to Mario. The truth, unfortunately, is not nearly so neat.

2. Forget Dimitar Berbatov, what in the world has happened to Park Ji-Sung?  The South Korean used to be one of Fergie's favorites, and one would assume that Parks's terrier-like tenaciousness would suit United's need-for-speed lineup well (as much as it pains me to make dog analogies about South Korea's greatest footballing export).  Have we seen the last of Parky in a United kit?

3. Why hasn't King Kenny played Maxi Rodriguez and Craig Bellamy more often this season?  Reduced to bit players before midweek, the duo appear far more capable than many others that a mediocre Liverpool side has routinely trotted out onto the pitch.

4. And speaking of Liverpool, could their season get any more comedic?  I can't decide if their red kit was designed to symbolize the supporters' embarrasment, or the color of the cards collected by their goalkeepers.  One red card on Tuesday for Doni was hilarious; a yellow that should have been red for Brad Jones was beyond hysterical.  King Kenny can retire, his mission now complete: we're not laughing with you, Kenny, we're laughing at you.

5. Does the FA utilize any employees to make decisions, or do they just shake a Magic 8 Ball? I've written ad nauseum about the corruption and ineptitude that permeate this decrepit organization, but the Magic 8 ball is the only explanation that makes sense regarding the FA's simultaneous and mind-numbing decisions to uphold Shaun Derry's red card while not charging Mario Balotelli for a much more dangerous offense.

Not Arrogant, Just Better

photo by Lincolnian (Brian) - BUSY	via PhotoRee

Sir Alex makes three changes to the side that lost to Arsenal last weekend, including John O’Shea in for an injured Patrice Evra, Fabio slotting in to right back to replace his brother Rafael, and Park Ji-Sung relegating Nani to the bench.  Chelsea go with largely the same side that has terrorized United in the past, their front line composed of Drogba, Malouda and Kalou, and David Luiz, no longer cup tied, in central defense.  Worryingly for United, Fernando Torres can’t crack the Blues’ starting lineup and remains on the Chelsea bench.  It’s an all or nothing kind of day, particularly for Chelsea, who need a win just to prolong the season.

Somewhat unbelievably, the game starts with a shocker, Chicharito sending David Luiz back to remedial defending school and opening the scoring for the home team inside of 40 seconds.  The little Mexican is picked out shoulder to shoulder with Chelsea’s newest defender, found on a perfect ball from Park, and there’s little work to do to put the ball past a stunned Petr Cech as United grab a shockingly easy and early goal.  The goal works front to back, Rio to Carrick, Carrick to Park, and Park to Hernandez as the Chelsea defense looks about as easy as a cheap hooker on a the day of navy shore leave.  Cue joyous hugging on the United sideline with Fergie reaching over for Mike Phelan and Berba and Ando celebrating, and Carlo Ancelloti sending Alex to the warm-up line for Luiz, whose pride seems to be the biggest injury sustained on the play.

United go all out on attack, looking to kill the game off early, with waves of intent being shown by Rooney, Valencia and Park in particular.  Rooney is almost on target with a 35 yard laser that would have rivaled his City goal of one of the season’s best strikes, but a stretching Cech is just up to the challenge, and tips it wide.   Park is everywhere in the match’s first 10 minutes, the Korean playing as if trying to erase the bad taste left from last week’s game at the Emirates.   Chicharito almost doubles the lead on 10 minutes, a stretching Luiz just getting an unspotted foot on a through ball to Hernandez, throwing off the Mexican’s timing by a mere milisecond.  On fifteen minutes it’s Rooney's turn to nearly double the lead, capping off a flowing move begun once again by Park with Valencia picking out the striker, who is not closed down properly by Chelsea.

Ace of Spades

photo by thun	via PhotoRee

December 13 / Old Trafford / Manchester, England

Let's call a spade a spade: Machester United's win over Arsenal tonight was a solid if unspectacular match that afforded the type of result the Manager had in mind when he made out the lineup sheet. Benching the team's leading scorer, and replacing him with an effective five man midfield, Sir Alex went with his favored continental approach, a more conservative and controlled offense preferred to the faster and funner, but also looser 4-4-2 formation. In the end, the move paid off in spades with a 1-nil victory that moved United back to top of the EPL table with a game still in hand.  Although not offering much in the way of action to excite the neutral or casual fan, the Red Devils' victory last night over one of their bitterest rivals is sure to bring a smile to the face of any Manchester United supporter.

Herewith the keys to the match, as seen from my seat:

• United packed the midfield with five players on defense, with both Nani and Park working tirelessly off the ball to support Anderson, Carrick and Fletcher in the middle. This tactic, while ostensibly contributing to the stop / start nature  of the game, disrupted the Gunners' usual attacking flow of passes, and never allowed them to get on track. I can't remember a game for either team in which there were so many incomplete passes, the result of the constant, pressured defense both sides featured. By stacking the middle, United also forced Arsenal out wide to attack from the flanks, with the Gunners reduced to offering long crosses in the general direction of an isolated and beleaguered Marouanne Chamakh.

A Stroll in the Park

photo by antonius_incognitus	via PhotoRee

Where else can we begin but with pre-game news that Owen Hargreaves, United's lost boy, is gaining his first Premier League start in over two years today. Seen only once in a United kit (and that only fleetingly) since September 2008, Hargreaves was formerly one of the world's most skilled holding midfielders, but has faced a series of knee operations and extended rehabilitation that have made him the forgotten man of this Red Devils squad. It's a somewhat shocking announcement that he'll start today, and like United fans worldwide, I'm holding my breath today to see how Hargreaves looks on the pitch.


United begin the game in a 4-4-1-1 formation today, opting for Chicharito up front by himself, with Obertan tucking in just behind. Berbatov is left off even the bench today, apparently under the weather. Sickness has ravaged the United roster for today's game, with several Red Devils, including the famed Gaffer himself, feeling the effects. 


Five minutes in, and the news is not good.  It's a hushed Old Trafford crowd that witnesses yet another setback for Hargreaves, as he limps off the field with what looks like a pulled left hamstring, unable to continue.  It's a sad and especially early ending to the much anticipated outing, and Fergie's bold roll of the dice has turned up snake eyes.  

Going, Going.... Gone?

photo by rafaelmarquez	via PhotoRee

I Wonder if  They'll Broadcast it in HD.  The raging battle for control of Liverpool FC moves to Britain's High Court today, as the Royal Bank of Scotland tries to stop current [Ed. Note: now apparently former] owners Hicks and Gillette from removing several of the club's directors who voted for the sale to New England Sports Ventures and replace them with directors more favorable to their point of view.  All chips are in, and it's up to the Court to decide the venerable EPL club's fate.  Prospective NESV head honcho, John Henry, has taken the battle to social media, tweeting today for the first time in over a year, and telling Liverpool supporters that they're "all rooting for the same thing."

Late Word (or is it early word, since we're in the US) out of England has it that Hicks doesn't even own his shares anymore.  Who owns them?  Mill Financial, of course.  Talk about dirty laundry being aired in public.  I knew a "loan-to-own" hedge fund would get involved in this fiasco before too long....  And Mill Financial seems to be offering a bid of its own for Liverpool.  Stay tuned.

Buddy Movie.  Real Madrid coach Jose Mourinho is in the news again, this time for saying he prefers his time managing in England to all the other countries in which he has been in charge.  In brief but insightful comments, Mourinho also stated that his best friend among all the world's football coaches is none other than Manchester United boss Sir Alex Ferguson.  I smell a sequel: "Return to Old Trafford: This Time He's in Charge!"

Some Refreshing Honesty For a Change.  Admitting that his focus hasn't been there for the season's first seven league games, United winger Park Ji Sung has pledged to improve going forward.  It's a good thing Park is from South Korea, and not its neighbor to the North, as an admission of this kind up there would have led to seven years hard labor under the Dear Leader's football program.  Unfortunately, Park's rebound in form will have to wait a few more days, as late word out of the Korean camp has Park being scratched for today's friendly against Japan [Ed. Note: can Korea and Japan actually play a "friendly"?  I thought those guys hated each other.]

Great Goal.  Don't miss this video of Scotland Under-21 star Chris Maguire scoring directly from a kick off.  Goalies, you have been warned!

So French.  New Le Bleus bossman Laurent Blanc has concluded that a psychological profiler was best equipped to help him decide who his next captain should be  Armed with a 50 question test that was administered to all players, the profiler is tasked with helping Blanc assess his best leader.  I wonder who Clarice Starling will pick....

I'm outta here.  And that's farlieonfootie for October 12.