The Long March

photo by luigi morante	via PhotoRee

I find myself missing the regular EPL games on a weekend like this past one. Sure, there were some exciting games to be found, including Manchester United's 2-1 win over Southampton, as well as Birmingham's come from behind 3-2 victory over Coventry City, but all in all I found myself longing for Tuesday and the real action to start once again.

On the one hand, I acknowledge that there are way too many competitions in English football -- EPL, Champions League (for the lucky few), Europa League (for the next lucky few), FA Cup, League Cup, etc. -- so many, in fact, that the games and storylines begin to blend into one another. Is Birmingham City fighting relegation or playing for a Cup final?  Or both?

On the other hand, I love the constancy and rhythm of the English football season. One game after another, week after week, the cruel schedules march on. Only the toughest survive, but if your team doesn't, well hey, there's another competition brewing just around the corner.

I Have a Feeling I've Seen This Movie Before

photo by ScypaxPictures	via PhotoRee

Another game, another lackadaisical opening 60 minutes of football.  The end result?  Another win for United in a season full of games strikingly similar to the the FA Cup tie vs. Southampton played earlier this afternoon.  Ryan Giggs and Nani's introduction near the hour mark changed the game in favor of the Reds, and Michael Owen and Chicharito did the damage in a 2-1 game that was even more uncomfortable than the scoreline suggests.


Sir Alex sent out a mix of veteran and youngish talent to take on the Saints at St. Mary's Stadium, in a side that included United new boy Anders Lindegaard between the sticks, and the initial results from the team were not pleasing.  For the better part of an hour, United looked dull, listless, plodding, and totally lacking anything approaching a cutting edge -- looking closer to a spoon than a knife -- and lacked quality and accuracy on their passing (I would add to that "shooting," but there was such a paucity of offense during the first hour that to use the word would stretch the definition beyond an appropriate level).

Sex Sells

photo by Sebastian Anthony	via PhotoRee

And so do transfer rumors, especially with the January window still open.  How else to explain the logic behind @ianprior's boneheaded decision to tease the Twitter-verse yesterday with a "Guardian Exclusive" transfer story that turned out to be nothing more than a reiteration of Inter's desire to buy Gareth Bale?  Thanks, but next time tell me something I don't know.... 

That story was followed in quick succession by a release from Liverpool announcing that they've turned down a Chelsea offer in the vicinity of £35-40 million for striker Fernando Torres, and rumors of fresh scouse bids for both Luis Suarez and Charlie Adam.  What's going on here?  It's silly season, of course, and there's nothing like transfer rumors and stories to get the blood pumping a bit and sell newspapers (or online advertisements).

We're even guilty of it here at farlieonfootie.  Take a quick gander over at the column on the right, which displays our most popular posts of the past 30 days.  I'll wait for you....

Ying and Yang

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Once again, it's columnist Ed with the other point of view.  I say black, he says white:

Before United fans get too excited about their gritty comeback, and how this team has the character to win, and how the Sir Alex always makes the right moves, let us remember that the team they beat tonight, the team that took them to the brink, was a team that has only one player who would make the United roster.  Of course, I'm talking again about Charlie Adam, and of course he may very well have been the best player on the pitch, but still, one man does not make an army.

It should also be noted that at the end of the day, for all the young superstars on United, it was Ryan Giggs that was relied on by Sir Alex to stem the tide.  Giggs made an immediate impression on the game, and put together some Adam-esque passes to put United ahead.  Of course the difference between Adam's passes and Giggs' is that when Adam plays the ball to his forwards they are usually outrun and have to turn back, whereas when Giggs plays it to his guys no one is going to slow them down.

Because of their 2-nil lead at halftime, this defeat will likely have a deep emotional impact on Blackpool.  They outplayed and outclassed the 80% line-up that Sir Alex condescendingly and incorrectly believed was enough to beat Blackpool.  It was only after he was down 2-nil at the half that he realized he would have to pull out everything he had to get a win or a draw.

Dreamland

photo by blahidontreallycare	via PhotoRee

ACT I

SCENE ONE

(A thatch-roofed bar that’s seen its best days years ago, located well off the beaten path, deep in the heart of the Florida Keys. A stranger wearing a dark sunglasses, jeans, no shoes, and a red jersey, newish looking, with the number 9 on the back, and the word "Berbatov" emblazoned on the top is sitting by himself at the bar, staring intently at the old television hanging from one of the cabana posts. A series of large green palms rustle in the background, being blown by a forceful wind out of the northwest, as storm clouds begin to gather on the horizon.)

FARLIEONFOOTIE

How 'bout a beer, Nick?

NICK THE BARTENDER

     (Glances up from drying some glasses)

Whaddya want?

FARLIEONFOOTIE

You tried the St. Martin Brown yet?  I had it at a Beer Festival this past weekend, up in South Carolina.  Went with some friends, and tasted a bunch of beers.  That was one of the best.

NICK

You have fun?

        

FARLIEONFOOTIE

Yeah.  Anything not sound fun about the words "beer" and " festival"?            
                              (Pauses)
Give me a St. Martin. And turn up the volume.  United's on.

(fade out)

SCENE TWO

(A festive Bloomfield Road.  A small but frenzied crowd cheers on the home team, lustily chanting, clapping, stomping their feet, and showering United with prolonged boos and cat calls.)

FAN #1

Cathcart and Campbell.......?!  Can you bloody believe it?

FAN #2

's unbelievable.  Two set pieces, two goals. 

FAN #1

Yeah, but it's all about Charlie, isn't it?  Guy's a fu**in' genius.

FAN #2

God, I hope he doesn't leave.  But the price just went up if he does.

FAN #1

                       That'll show the bloody scousers.  Serves 'em right.

SCENE THREE

...And Damned if You Don't

Columnist Ed Explains His Most Recent Column to One of His Many Fans
photo by brennheit bakst	via PhotoRee

Columnist Ed makes his regular appearance, today offering his thoughts in defense of Blackpool's handling of the Charlie Adam situation:

Oh, how weary I am of defending Blackpool....  How often do I have to hear about how refreshing they are but how they also don’t really belong in the EPL...?  And now, at EPLTalk, a new cynical piece by Earl Reed proclaims: “Why Blackpool Should Have Accepted Adam’s Transfer Request.”

Ugh.

As those who support the Tangerines know, Blackpool have only picked up six points in their last six games, and have lost their last two.  The article asks this: “[C]an they really compete? Their recent play may be an aberration, but it’s much more likely that this team was overachieving through the first three months.”  And so, the article effectively concludes, Blackpool should just give it all up right now and sell Adam for £4.7 million because at the end of the year when they're relegated they won’t be able to get much for him anyhow.

Wow.  Let’s begin with some facts. First, right now Blackpool stand on 28 points with 16 games remaining to get the 12 or so points needed to stay up in the Premier League.  They also happen to stand in 12th position, six points above the hapless Wigan, Wolves, and West Ham United. 

Going Down

photo by Gideon Tsang	via PhotoRee

Now that the season’s finish line is beginning to hazily appear, as if a mirage still several miles off, it’s time for a semi-famous prediction about how it’s all going to end.  Not for the guys at the top of the table – far too much import in that, and a massive game in hand tomorrow night at Bloomfield Road, which could see United clinging narrowly to a two point lead over the Gunners, or vaulting out to a five point advantage over their nearest rivals.  No, I’m talking about the race for the bottom, for relegation.   It’s just about as interesting, and much more competitive than the race for the title, with arguably as many as ten teams involved.

Let’s start the predictions off with some fireworks: West Ham will not be relegated.   Maybe they deserve to be, and maybe it’s just my latent sympathy for Avram Grant and our farlieonfootie columnist Ian, but I don’t think the Hammers are going down.  And let’s face it: how bold would I really be if I picked the Hammers to fall into the Championship?  If leadership is about having vision, this prediction could look spectacularly good or bad in four month’s time.  In any event, I see the Hammers rallying behind Frederique Piquiounne, Jonathan Spector, and – you guessed it—Scotty Parker to cling, just barely, to their status as a Premier League Club.  This weekend’s draw at Goodison Park was a nice result on the road for West Ham, and their form over their last six matches is actually twelfth best in the league.  Not tops certainly, but not relegation-bound, either.

Carbonated Footie

Some of farlieonfootie's newest fans, from the World Beer Fest
photo by pink_fish13	via PhotoRee

In addition to the usual football column, today's version of the blog will include several observations from a recent trip to the World Beer Fest in Columbia, South Carolina. After all, what could be better than a weekend full of footie, unless it's a weekend full of footie and beer? Now how the World Beer Fest happened to choose Columbia, South Carolina as its winter home I'll never know, but I'm guessing the event was rather optimistically named....

First off, regarding the football I saw: Liverpool looked better on Saturday than they have in many weeks, although I wouldn't be getting too carried away about the rest of the season if I were a fan of the reds (which I am decidedly not). True, Torres appears to be finally waking up from his somnambulistic state, hitting the back of the net twice yesterday, but even I could have scored the two goals he did -- and I'm not very good. For his second goal, which capped a 3-nil win over a downtrodden Wolves side, the goalkeeper wasn't even in front of the net, leaving Torres nothing to do but spank the ball home from three feet away.  And true, also, that Raul Meireles is finally showing a bit of the form expected when the Scousers bought him this summer from Porto [Ed. Note: Have any Liverpool supporters thanked Uncle Roy for signing Meireles, or is it not appropriate to show even the smallest sign of gratitude to their former boss man?].  But let's be completely honest here: that was Wolves the reds beat, a side currently sitting one spot north of the southernmost spot in the league, and Wolverhampton turned in an absolute stinker yesterday afternoon after several strong recent performances. So let's not get too hot and bothered over King Kenny's triumphant return. The team he inherited will not be relegated, but they're right where they belong: this Liverpool team is a mid-table club.

Top Hat

photo by Nesster	via PhotoRee

If familiarity breeds contempt, this weekend is full of matches between EPL teams that hate each other. All the games on offer today and tomorrow involve teams which played each other less than a month ago, during the week between Christmas and New Year's Day. How in the world did the EPL decide to manage its schedule like this...? Clearly, there wasn't a lot of thought went into putting this portion of the season together.....

In any event, United took on Birmingham again this afternoon, in a rematch of the dull and dreary game at St. Andrews in which Lee Mason cheated the Reds out of a couple points on a late goal. And what a difference four weeks made....

In thrashing the Blues 5-nil, United displayed a cutting edge not seen in weeks, absolutely destroying a under-talented Brum side which was never really in the match. From the opening minutes, as a Giggs corner was flicked on by O'Shea and headed home by Berbatov, the Reds were dominant. United piled continual pressure on their former teammate, Ben Foster -- who ended the game looking shellshocked -- and cut open the Birmingham defense early and often in juimping out to a 3-nil halftime lead.

On Blackpool and My Other Favorite Charlie

Columnist Ed, on Blackpool, and two of his favorite Charlies:


It appears that few other than us here at farlieonfootie believe that Charlie Adam is worth more than £ 3.5 million, and so as each day passes it becomes more likely that he will remain a Tangerine.  This is obviously good news for Blackpool fans, and, I think, for Charlie Adam.  The Tangerine story is compelling and not yet finished; it would be a shame for him to depart before his work is done.

Last week, the Tangerines were beaten by a bottom-of-the-barrel West Bromwich Albion side.  While the game drew some positive reviews in the press, it was actually the worst game Blackpool has put together in quite some time.  Perhaps this was the result of the emotional game against Liverpool on Tuesday – the lack of depth of the team is always a concern.  Regardless, other than Vaughan, who scored a top flight goal and played extremely well at midfield, Blackpool’s typical rapid and sharp passing was off, and Neil Eardley was once again exposed repeatedly at the right defensive position.  



In fact, Coach Holloway had to pull Eardley in the second half because his play had become such a problem.  It pains me to say this, but while Eardley plays hard, his lack of pace and physical skill are continually a problem.  Expect the opposition to work his side more and more every week until he either raises his play (surprisingly, he’s only 22) or a change is made.

This week Blackpool is at home against Sunderland, whose head was recently removed when Darren Bent was sold for an astounding £18 million to Aston Villa.  I say astounding because that seems a lot for a team like Villa to pay in light of their recent fire sale of their squad.  In spite of this transfer, I expect Sunderland to come out charging in an attempt to prove that Bent is not needed.   However, if Blackpool is able to withstand this initial charge, the confidence of Sunderland should start to wane.  Blackpool will also need DJ Campbell to step up again; his missed opportunities at West Brom were painful.  Prediction?  I expect a Blackpool victory in this one, by a score of 2 to 1.

By the way, what’s up with that Sky Sports News transfer touch screen?  They have their commentators touch the team and then they click the player at issue.  The player does this bit where he turns takes a step and crosses his arms.  I have yet to see them fail to have footage of a player doing this.  Weird.  Kind of makes me want to do it and send it in to them....

More interestingly, a Charlie other than Charlie Adam has caught my attention at the network, and I’m speaking here of Charlie Webster.  The other evening she was commentating in a red cocktail dress and it definitely left me flaring my nostrils a bit (I find the ladies love that move). 


Yeah, this is what I'm talking about.

Kind of crazy, really, here in the US of A we’ve got Chris Berman and Linda Kohn, and in dreary old Britain they’ve got ladies like Charlie winking at me and talking all British like about "Leicester this" or "Newcastle that," or whatever really, doesn’t matter much.  Time to step it up ESPN . . . . .


This is farlieonfootie for January 22.