Letting it Flow: Week Five in the Barclay's Premier League

photo by rappensuncle	via PhotoRee

o Two things we learned while watching Everton tear Swansea apart limb-by-limb on Saturday: 1) The bloom may be off the rose for Manager Michael Laudrup and his boys from Wales -- the Swans' second loss in a row has seriously stalled their momentum and called into question just how strong the squad actually is; and 2) No such questions are being asked of David Moyes and Everton. Liverpool's top club looked fantastic once again this season at the Liberty Stadium, and only poor refereeing has managed to stop the Toffees from reaching 12 points after their first five games. So much for Everton's traditional slow start....

o Chelsea appear to be morphing into a La Liga side before our very eyes. Pretty to the eye -- except if you're Roman Abramovich, who appeared as if he was watching paint dry from his customary seat at Stamford Bridge -- but lacking a certain directness that is a hallmark of the English game, Chelsea step-overed and back-heeled it with best of them on Saturday but were less successful at finding goal -- only second half substitute Victor Moses seemed the least bit intent on blazing a path toward net for the Blues. On a bright note, however, along with their slim 1-nil victory over Stoke, Chelsea appear to have mastered the art of the Spanish flop, with Branislav Ivanovich and Oscar displaying perfect form in their attempts to con the referee.

o Note to future opponents: please make certain to mark Javi Garcia on set plays. I've lost count of the number of headers the City newcomer has managed to put on-target over the past three outings, and he just may be the most dangerous set piece player in the game right now.

o Like the turning of the leaves, one true sign of the nascent fall season was spotted this weekend as Le Professor broke out the sideline puffer jacket for the Gooners' game at Eastlands on Sunday. If only his counterpart Roberto Mancini had deemed the weather cool enough for his natty blue and white scarf, we could have officially declared the new season to be in full swing.

o Kudos to American Clint Dempsey for his first start in front of the home fans at Whitehart Lane on Sunday. Our view was that the midfielder looked energetic and dangerous against QPR, but may have been trying just a bit too hard to find the net. Here's some advice, Clint: relax and let it flow. The goals will come.

o While we appreciate that Hatem Ben Arfa and the rest of the boys at Newcastle were attempting to restore Papiss Cisse's confidence by letting him take a penalty at home against Norwich City on Sunday, man oh man, we wonder how far the resulting miss may have set back the Senegalese striker. While Cisse may have made the Geordies wonder if his fellow countryman Demba Ba was expendable with his form in the latter half of last season, the shoe is now firmly on the other foot. And that's the same foot that brought about a moonshot of a penalty that should be passing by the International Space Station any day now....

What's In a Name?

Columnist Ed is on his high horse.  Again:

Champions League......CHAMPIONS LEAGUE.....ChAMpionS LeaguE.....oooh oooh AHHH AHHH!!!  Can't you just here that crazy Champions League anthem tune when you read that?  He wait, does anyone like that anthem ?  I don't.  To me it  sounds like national anthem of one of those countries you've  never heard of that somehow sneaks a gold medal at the Olympics in the three-legged race: “And now, the National Anthem of the Republic of Smerzagrovnia, and a hearty congratulations on their first ever Olympic gold....” 

Here's a suggestion – and don't just say “no” in a knee jerk way – how about going a different direction and trying, say, the theme from Shaft?  Come on, give that hickuppy guitar and playful background keyboard a listen:

Spectacular.

And speaking of spectacular, I don't know what was better, that amazing second goal of Oscar (talk about swerve and dip), or that amazing first touch he took to put the ball behind Pirlo before he spun around him and took the shot.  Wow. 

My only issue with Oscar is the dead horse I've been beating about many footballers playing in Europe, but particularly Brazilian footballers:  What's up with the first name only on the jersey?  It just screams “egomaniac” to me, as in “I am THE Oscar! I'm so fabtacular (look at my hair!) that everyone just knows me by my first name!  I'm just THAT popular!!” 

Well, Oscar, I'm sorry to say it but I find it painful that your dropping your last name when your first name is “Oscar.”  Sorry kid, but it's not exactly lyrical or original or tough.  More muppet garbage dweller to me.  And dude,  you've just started playing!!! 

I think if I owned a soccer team, I'd put an end to that whole thing.  I'd start by appointing Ray Lewis as my Ego Enforcement Officer and instruct him to go all Terry Tate on anyone who gets ahead of himself.

 

"Hey Oscar, baby!! If you don't stitch on your Last, I'm goin' to kick your . . . .!!!  Wooohhh!!!”

Anyhow, Chelsea looked the better team in the game even though they ended up with a draw.  Plus, I'm not sure if the boss man is right that Chelsea isn't that good.  Hazard, Oscar, Ramirez, Lampard – they all looked pretty good to me.  Even Fernan....nah, he looked pretty ordinary, really.

The game that shocked me the most was the Manchester City v. Real Madrid game.  I have never seen such speed as Madrid's.  For most of the game, it seemed like Real was playing with 12 or 13 players and City had 8.  Even Tevez looked pretty pedestrian against Real's fast defense.  As a famous commenter on this site said, only Ya Ya looked fast enough to handle the speed.  He was absolutely in full warp mode when he was taking the ball up the pitch on breaks.