Spanked: Thoughts on Spurs, Chelsea and Arsenal

photo by Franco Folini	via PhotoRee

A refreshingly realistic Ed, on Spurs' traditional end of season tailspin and other thoughts:

• Spurs decidedly played the part they historically play against Chelsea this weekend -- that of a fifth place team with pretty much no business making the top four.  They lost, of course, four to nil, and let's not kid ourselves into thinking that the game was actually closer than that.  It should have been 1 - 0 with Spurs down to ten men after about a minute if the refs had not made a charitable offside call.  And this was just a preview of what was to come, as it turns out, over and over and over and over....

• Chelsea let Spurs possess the ball, which Spurs did, but it was no surprise that Spurs did so harmlessly.  Kyle Walker was playing in an advanced role on the right and his lack of skill was exposed by Cesar Azpilicueta.  The Chelsea left back made it clear yet again why Ashley Cole now occupies a spot on the bench.  On the other side, Gylfi Sigurdsson is simply not enough of an athlete to make a difference out wide.  And Aaron Lennon, who buzzed around in the number 10 position more often that not, did his typical "I'm crazy fast and dart all over" routine but never threatened the goal.  Poor Spurs, outclassed and outmuscled.

• Was it the manager's fault?  Well, some blame could be allowed for Benteleb and Sandro being outmatched by Chelsea's pressing midfield of Ramires and Lampard.  Perhaps Dembele and Paulinho -- however tired they were -- should have been pressed into action, as Benteleb is a liability defensively and did make a poor pass right to Samuel Eto'o.  But ultimately the middle triangle of Chelsea just bossed the game because they were better.  Nemanja Matic is a tough holder, covering ground and making the middle a no fly zone.  Matic cost $21MM from Benfica.  Wait, how much did Spurs pay for Erik Lamela to warm the bench?

• A word on Jan Vertonghen is due.  The defender made noise about defecting from Spurs because he wanted to play in the Champions League.  To this I sometimes think -- if you were as good as you think you are , shouldn't you be able to carry Spurs to the Champions League?  Don't you bear some responsibility for them not making it?  Well, it seems the football gods agreed with me in part, as the first goal was the direct result of a Vertongen mental mistake.  Look, he's a great player and a terrific addition to Spurs, but dude, be a leader!

Of Peter Pan and Supermodels: EPL Week Eight in Review

photo by Loren Javier	via PhotoRee

o Mario Balotelli's overhead kick aside, Manchester City looked a bit pedestrian in the first half without Kun Aguero and David Silva in the lineup against Villa on Saturday. Not that you couldn't say the same thing about Manchester United earlier in the same day, with Wayne Rooney, Nani and Chicharito on the bench. I guess these stars really do earn their paychecks...! City pulled it back around in the second half, and Aston Villa never looked as if they were in the contest after the break. The stage is now. set for quite the Manchester derby next weekend, but the  question is which Roberto Mancini-led team will show up: the cantennacio, defensive-minded one, or the more attack-minded side that has featured more often this season.....

o I'm beginning to think Baltotelli's hairdo is a stick-on strip  It changes much too often to be real.

o Owen Hargreaves limped onto the pitch for the Sky Blues on Saturday without pulling a muscle in the process. Will wonders never cease....?

o Alex McLeish had Villa looking in form on Saturday; or rather, that should be he had them looking in the same form that he had Birmingham City last season. Hope the Villans fans didn't get overly excited about their undefeated start.

o I thought I'd heard just about everything in an English accent, until I heard the commentator during the Chelsea - Everton game refer to the Blues' owner as Ro-MAN Ab-ra-MO-vitch.  I don't speak much Russian, but isn't that a case of putting the accent on the wrong syl-LA-ble?

A Good Man is Hard to Find

photo by Free-ers	via PhotoRee

The spinning wheel that is the Chelsea manager search came to a rest earlier this week with the not-so-surprising announcement that Andres Villas-Boas (British announcers are going to have a field day trying to pronounce this one) has been named the new manager at Chelsea, after releasing himself from bondage in Porto and freeing the way for the Son of the Special One to return to Stamford Bridge. 


In some ways, this move makes perfect sense: young, talented and up-and-coming manager, looking to make his name in Europe, is seduced by the prospect of a dream appointment at the top of one of England's "big" clubs, a club where he once worked at the right hand of the Master. But look more closely, readers -- and the reasonings for this move become even clearer. This isn't just the story of Andres Villas-Boas wanting to come to Chelsea to increase his own personal glory.  It's also the story of a domineering, perpetually meddling and megalomaniacal owner, and the struggle to find someone who is talented enough to manage the club, yet also pliant enough to to live under the sizable thumb of a certain Russian thief.  I mean Billionaire.