Bottoms up!

The Calm Before the Storm. Although it's been eight days since we last saw Manchester United in action, don't worry too much.  I know the international break seems painful, but relief is in sight.  Starting next Saturday, the boys in red will play nine games in 27  days, or for those of you who are less fortunate in the math department, once every three days for almost four weeks.  Sure, this encompasses EPL, Champions League and Carling Cup action, but so what. I, for one, am ready for some footie.

Photo by Thomas Duchnicki :: Location Scout via Photoree

Rio isn't Pipped.  For those familar with US Major League Baseball lore, Wally Pipp was the NY Yankee first baseman who allegedly sat out of the lineup one day due to a headache (never mind the inconvenient fact that the "headache" was actually a concussion due to a fractured skull resulting from Pipp being hit by a batting practice pitch) and never played again due to the quality of his replacement -- the replacement in question being Lou Gehrig, the original Iron Man of sports, natch.  In any event, suffice it to say that it's not Rio's fate to be "pipped" by Stevie G for the England captaincy, as England's coach, Fabio Capello, finally made the correct decision and handed the armband back to Ferdinand.

Gazza Caught Drunk Driving -- Again.  Not that this semi-annual occurrence is news, but rather a question.  Why do the English call it "drink driving," while the Americans call it "drunk driving"?  Anyone?

Joe Hart Likes Jägermeister.  A lot, apparently.  Although it's not straight out of your typical coach's handbook, English goalie Joe Hart got ready for his upcoming match against Montenegro the old-fashioned way: by getting rip-roaringly drunk and staying out until 5am.  In a move sure to anger Coach Fabio Capello, but no doubt delight the shareholders of Mast-Jägermeister, the makers of the Jägermeister brand of digestif, the English 'keeper danced on a bar and downed shots with his buddies until just hours before meeting up with his English teammates.  Uncle Harry Redknapp perhaps summed up the issue best when he explained that the problem with English footballers isn't the quality, it's the drinking.

It's 5 o'clock somewhere (but not here, unfortunately), and I'm farlieonfootie for October 11.